To TCM:

Damn it already, why haven't you picked me as a guest programmer? I can't believe you had that twinky Rose McGowan on. Honestly, her claim to fame is she got to have a gun for a leg in a movie. And seriously, she gets to pick classic movies and try to pontificate on them? I would think she would considers Star Wars a classic.

Tonight you have Bill Maher, as a guest programmer. A man who inexplicably compares musicals to porn in conversation with Robert Osborne. PORN for crying out loud. To Robert Osborne, who looks like he has never even heard of people going pantless. And here I am waiting, wanting, begging to be invited. But for some inexplicable reason I haven't received my invitation in the mail. Nor an email invitation. And yes, I have checked my spam folder.

I can't figure out why you hate me?

But should you change your mind, here are my picks. Call me.

1. I Know Where I am Going
2. Born to Kill
3. Sullivan's Travels
4. The In-Laws
5. All That Heaven Allows
   

Update: Decided I also needed to add: Gunga Din, The Magnificent Ambersons, and The Thin Man.