Monday, December 11, 2006

Rumble in the Tummy

The other day I woke up to find that Yuko had gotten sick. It looked like a scene from a really bad fraternity movie. There was barely a square inch of my office that she missed. She must have retched, walked a foot and then repeated the process. She is a small cat. I have no idea where she keeps that much matter. And I have seen her eat. She eats less than Nicole Richie at a restaurant that only serves Liver and Onions.

Off course, it is completely my fault. Yuko is a rescue cat. From the time she was three days old until we adopted her a year and half later she lived at the Humane Society Shelter. This is not to say the Humane society doesn't earn their name, but I can guarantee you that foodies would rather be held by the Khmer Rouge then do three squares a day with them. Same food, same time, everyday. When we got Mushu, we didn't know you shouldn't change a cat's food just because you had a coupon or a different brand was on sale. Because of this, Mushu has a stomach like a weathered sailer, he doesn't care if it may keep him chained to his litter box for a while, only pansies don't eat everything in their bowl. Yuko, gets gas if you give her too much tuna. Or too little.

So when I went shopping the other day I noticed Cat Food on my list. Originally, we had bought expensive cat food. Nothing was too good for our Yuppie cats. But when Yuko kept throwing it up the vet suggested we try something else. So now we serve our cats the McDonald's of cat food and almost never does it come back up. Do we hate ourselves for giving our cats fatty food? The human equivalent of which has been profiled in bestsellers like Fast Food Nation? Damn, right we do! The only thing we spend more time worrying about in our house, besides ourselves, is our cats. Our parents think we're nuts. Our friends make fun of us. The neighbours hate us. And do we care. Only if it will make the cats unhappy.

So keeping this in mind I thought to myself, while I stood in the pet food aisle of the grocery store. 'Hmmm, don't we usually get the cats Brand X in seafood? Maybe, they would like lamb instead? Ahh yes, lamb would be nice all over my office floor.'

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I LOVE it!!