Monday, June 18, 2007


Energy Saving

Hello my name is Tash and I am lazy. Yes, it’s true and I am OK with embracing that. I hate housework as much as some people hate the dentist! I can be convinced to do almost anything other than house work, often I convince myself to lay in a chaise lounge in the backyard instead of doing chores. Trust me; it’s not even a hard sell.

I have come to accept the fact that I will traditionally take the path of least resistance when it comes to doing anything in my personal life! My girlfriends have always teased me about making my way ‘through the door to bad decisions’, ah but you see this doorway is often less crowed. I have no choice; because I am lazy I MUST enter the door that doesn’t require a great deal of prep work!

This doesn’t mean I haven’t tried to get rid of this nasty trait, believe me I have, but honestly that requires a great deal of work! For example, I have a secrete staircase in my house. I can’t tell you where in my house, because I also plan to use it as a panic room should the need ever arise…but I digress. I recycle….um sort of. I absolutely do not through out my empty beverage containers. Rather I collect them with good intentions and plans to save my environment, also to get money back and buy more full bottles! But as you now know I am lazy. I have run out of room in my very tiny house to store all of my recyclables. I have not brought back my bottles in a year…seriously I know. They now have been moved to my secrete staircase, which is full…to the brim. But hey I am not cluttering up landfills, only my staircase. Which you know means I am screwed if I ever need that panic room.

I also recycle men and I have come to believe that I do this in an effort to save energy as well! You see I am fabulous. Seriously, I mean it. I am out-freaking-standing. As a result the majority of men that I have dated are more than willing to get back on board for another kick at the can. I re-date almost every single guy I have gone out with. People think I am crazy, but really I am efficient! I don’t have to go out and expend a great deal of energy on cultivating someone new by convincing them I am out-freaking-standing. I have completely bought into the green movement by being lazy. I follow the three R’s: Reduce energy, Recycle men and Regret oh so many choices! Kyoto Accord has nothing on me, I’m ahead of my freaking time!

11 comments:

muffy said...

Do you really think another kick at the CAN was an appropriate way to phrase that you re-cycle men. OOh the metaphors! I guess it sounds better that another kick at the Badonkadonk!!!

Anonymous said...

Do you hide in the staircase when sharpshooters are near?

Anonymous said...

HA! I KNEW that you would be funny!

Jill said...

Ok, that is funny! I love that you have a panic room.

Tash said...

I absolutely did hide in the staircase during the sharp shooter incident!! Mind you, now I have no room for that type of emergency!

Anonymous said...

Only you could make lazy sound planned!

Geoff said...

I thought you just used to keep falling head over heals for me! Now I find out that this is just you being lazy?? You are a cruel, cruel woman!

amber said...

Why wouldn't you just stick with one instead of breaking up and getting back together? i think you probly arent as out-freaking-standing as you think. they probly leave you and then you beg them back.i think you just liek drama and thats why you do this.

Tash said...

Amber, Amber, Amber...the rules were don't blog angry. I understand that not every woman can have a secrete staircase, but your time will come. Until then work on being a touch more Zen. xxoo

Tash

Mikki said...

Hmm Tash, sounds like Amber is a bit bitter, tisk, tisk! Maybe you recycled one of her men ! She was so upset she forgot to check her grammar and spelling !!!

jennie said...

ZING, ZING, ZING
See Tash this why you are an urban legend.